Dear Lover,
Thank you for taking interest in enrolling at Short Stack High, the bitchingest place on earth.
By enrolling now you get:
- free download of a track from Short Stack's upcoming album
- upon enrollment, please be aware that you will automatically become better looking
- you will see exclusive footage of concerts we film and also deleted Short Stack TV episodes
- you get a puppy*
- you will get to play the Short Stack game
- and receive some discounted merchandise
If you do NOT enrol:
- your father will have an affair with his accountant... who is a large, bald man named Ivan
- zombie gorillas will eat your hands and cut out your tongue with a blunt rock
- you will start liking music by Fergie
Once again, thank you for your interest, you are making the world a better looking place.
Signed HEADMASTERS Diviney, Webb, Clemmensen.